After two continents, three airplanes, two stop-overs, two delays, and too many hours of hung-over travel, I finally arrived back in my home country, tired and in much need of a shower. However, my home country is quite a large one, and for my first Christmas with my family back in the States in 3 hours, it’ll be odd to be spending it in their new house in Las Vegas, home of faux grandeur and luxuries that, on my current salary, I can no longer afford.
Still, America is truly the land of the beautiful, and in my 24 hours here in Nevada I’ve already had several Christmas moments for which I’m very thankful. Ranking a close second behind, of course, seeing my family again, happened just a few hours ago when my mom and brother Andrew and I took a trip out to Vons supermarket for some last minute Christmas Eve dinner shopping. Holiday dinners is one of the few opportunities I have to prepare my special dish, mashed potatoes. After going around the aisles a few times, I finally came up on the packet of instant potatoes and powdered gravy. Having done my shopping, I ambled over to the alcohol section, where my wandering gaze landed upon (cue chorus to “Hallelujah”) the four-pack of Boddington’s Pub Ale. I immediately cradled the cans in my arms and quietly sang to them: “Hush little babies, don’t say a word; papa’s gonna drink you till he has to turd.” Then I ran to my mom by the shopping cart, and like all grown men do, screamed out: “Mommy, mommy, can I buy this for Christmas, mommy?” Since a single can cost $3USD back in Shanghai and Vons was selling these babies for $5 for 4, I knew my Christmas wish had been answered.
So here I am, about to have Christmas dinner, with four Boddingtons in the fridge and plenty of fat cells about to enter my system and hibernate there for the next 40 years. I’m looking forward to watching the Lakers/Heat game tomorrow and drinking that 18 year bottle of cognac that my dad is going to use to get me to speak truthfully about my life in Shanghai. I hope all of you out there are enjoying your Christmas just as much as I am about to, and to all those still in Shanghai dealing with the scrotum-shrinking cold, I have this traditional Christmas greeting for you:
