And who are you supposed to be?

Just finished watching the most recent episode of Mad Men last night. Betty and Don have the talk. And then…what the hell, that’s it? They go trick-or-treating? And how the hell does everyone drink so much and not get fat? Damn, I want to be back in the Sixties. Even though if I went back the way I am now, I’d be working in a laundry somewhere.

So in two days, Halloween is once again upon us. I’m attending an actual Halloween Party, of which there are ten thousand in Shanghai every year. But it’s special because I loathe Halloween parties, and I haven’t been to a proper one in a few years now. I actually only have two costumes, and frequently wear them at the same time: Super Mario, and drunken idiot. Here’s an example:

So this year I’m returning back to the Halloween stage, this time supposedly to be surrounded by hot, buxom Taiwanese nurses while I drink red wine out of an IV drip. Sounds wonderfully complicated, but putting this together falls completely out of the bounds of my enthusiasm. So, between now and Saturday night, I’m going to have to come up with something passably clever and impossibly easy to put together. And one that, despite their calls, does not require exposure of anything other than my big fat face.

Does anyone have any suggestions? Oh wait, no one reads this blog anyway, never mind.