It’s Good for the Skin

A few months ago, my good friend who shall remain nameless (bless her heart) responded to an an online ad looking for female models. Even in this sordid day and age, there actually are people who are innocent about important aspects of our culture. And by “our,” I mean all the porn-loving pervs out there who rule the world:

Email No. 1 (the response to the ad):

Hi —-,

Please find attached photo appropriate.

Email No. 2 (their response):

Thanks for your response.

Can you tell me if you have done facials before? Would you be comfortable taking a facial from a western model?

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Email No. 3 (where the hilarity begins):

you mean facial products right?

I have to ask my friend, I submitted her photo on her behalf.

Email No. 4 (where it all cums together):

Thanks for your email – I want to be clear on this. ‘Facial’ in this situation does not refer to the beauty treatment but the act of a man ejaculating on a womans face – please see the pic for an example. I am recruiting models for the adult entertainment industry. If this is something you are not interested in then please accept my apologies for the confusion. If you or any of your friends are interested then we pay excellent hourly rates of between RMB 4000 and 9000.

Hope to hear from you again,

Wow, 4000 RMB? Sign me up! And I have no knowledge of whether this very good friend of mine actually got her facial or not.